Anger and bitterness
There are so many ways we could have responded to the journey that we are on. As humans there are responses that seem almost automatic and easy. Anger, bitterness, and frustration to name a few. Why wouldn’t we be anger and bitter? Life’s thrown us a curve ball that has knocked our life upside down, so anger and frustration seem like the most logical way to react.
Andy and I have been angry and bitter at a lot of things and there’s nothing wrong with that.
That anger has brought out things about ourselves that we didn’t know were there before. Just the other day I woke up with a very negative attitude and felt strongly about needing to make a change with my job. I felt like making a dramatic change would somehow feel like I had control of life in general and make everything right. I thought I could hold the reigns on the uncontrollable wagon of cancer and miscarriage by changing my job. It sounds silly typing it but man did I believe that a new job was the fix to all our problems. I believed wholeheartedly because anger and an unclear mind was ruling over me.
What we realized though is that it becomes wrong for us when we let that anger control our thoughts, actions, and relationships. I clearly let anger rule over my attitude and therefore it ruined a day and I almost made a bad in the moment decision.
Since day one Andy and I knew there were two ways we could responded to what life has thrown at us. Anger and bitterness, or with the attitude that there is more to what life is giving us, there can be purpose, and it’s not meaningless. Thankfully we have been on the same wave length and trusting that God can bring meaning to all of it. Yes we are still angry and bitter at times but we are trying not to let it drive our responses and actions; because when we do we miss out on the life God has in store for us.